20 Uncomfortable Truths You Need to Hear: A Guide to Reality-Based Success

Read time: 8 minutes

Hey internet friends.

Last week's letter, we delved into the dangers of half-hearted efforts. You can read that (and all past issues, here).

Celebrating a success with you all here - my company Heights just crossed a major milestone: 100,000 customers!

Between them, we've had over 500,000 orders, and almost 50,000 monthly subscriptions of epic health supplements arriving to our customers doors, and over 5,000 5* reviews.

What all this amounts to: according to UBS who invited us to their Fast Growth Index Awards last week, we're the 13th fastest growing company in London! 🤯

Now that I've celebrated our success - let's get back to focusing on you.

20 Uncomfortable Truths Holding You Back

I posted a simple thread highlighting some harsh truths on X so today, I'll dive deeper on each of them.

Buckle up – this isn’t going to be a comfortable read, but it might just be the wake-up call you need. Let's go.

1. You’re Not Special ​
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   Hard pill to swallow, isn’t it? In a world of participation trophies, we’ve been conditioned to believe we’re all extraordinary. The truth? You’re one of billions. Your uniqueness doesn’t entitle you to success. It’s what you do with your ordinary self that makes you extraordinary.
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2. Life Isn’t Fair ​
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   Bad things happen to good people. Good things happen to bad people. The sooner you accept this, the sooner you can stop wasting energy on “why me?” and start focusing on “what now?”
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3. You’re Going to Die
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   Morbid, but motivating. Every second you spend scrolling mindlessly is a second closer to the end. How are you using your limited time?
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4. Everyone You Love Will Die ​
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   Another cheerful one, right? But it’s a powerful reminder to cherish your relationships now. Have you told your loved ones what they mean to you recently?
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5. You Can’t Please Everyone ​
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   Stop trying. It’s exhausting and futile. Instead, focus on pleasing the person in the mirror. Are you living up to your own standards?
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6. Not Everyone Will Like You And that’s okay. ​
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   Your energy is better spent deepening connections with those who appreciate you for who you are.
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7. Your Flaws Are Real We all have them. ​
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   The question is: are you working on yours or just pretending they don’t exist?
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8. Nothing Is Permanent ​
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   That job you hate? It’ll end. That relationship you cherish? It’ll change. Impermanence is the only constant. How does this change your perspective on your current situation?
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9. You Can’t Change the Past ​
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   But you can learn from it. Stop reliving old mistakes and start using them as stepping stones.
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10. You’re Responsible for Your Actions ​
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    No more blaming your parents, your boss, or the economy. Own your choices. How are you going to take responsibility for your life today?
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11. Success Takes Work ​
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    There’s no shortcut, no hack, no secret formula. It’s about showing up day after day, especially when you don’t feel like it.
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12. Failure Is Okay ​
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    In fact, it’s necessary. Every successful person you admire has failed repeatedly. What matters is how you respond to failure.
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13. You’re Not Always Right ​
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    Your opinions, beliefs, and worldviews are just that – yours. They’re not universal truths. How often do you challenge your own assumptions?
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14. Life Is Unpredictable ​
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    Your carefully laid plans will get derailed. Your ability to adapt is far more valuable than your ability to plan.
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15. You’re Going to Face Rejection ​
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    In love, in business, in life. It’s not about avoiding rejection; it’s about learning to handle it gracefully.
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16. You Have to Work Hard for What You Want ​
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    Dreaming is easy. Doing is hard. What concrete steps are you taking today towards your goals?
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17. Time Is Valuable ​
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    You can always make more money, but you can’t make more time. How are you investing your most precious resource?
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18. You Have to Take Risks ​
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    Comfort is the enemy of growth. What’s something that scares you that you need to do anyway?
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19. You’re Not Always Going to Feel Motivated ​
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    Discipline trumps motivation every time. What systems do you have in place to keep you moving forward, even when you don’t feel like it?
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20. You Can’t Control Everything ​
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    But you can control your reactions. In a world of chaos, your response is your superpower.

If reading this was uncomfortable, good.

Discomfort is where growth happens.

The ability to face these truths head-on will serve you well when life inevitably throws them at you.

For those ready to dig deeper, I recommend starting with “Meditations” by Marcus Aurelius. Stoic philosophy has been a game-changer for me in facing life’s harsh realities with grace and resilience.

To your uncomfortable growth,

Dan

P.S. If this resonated with you (or made you squirm), share it with someone who needs a reality check. Sometimes, the kindest thing we can do is tell the truth.

SOS (Science of Success) Curated:

LinkedIn of the week: Stop Apologising for your experience​

Podcast of the week: Marc Andresson on Joe Rogan​

My Tweet of the week: December Reset​

The Power of Embracing Uncomfortable Truths

A study published in the Journal of Experimental Social Psychology found that individuals who regularly confront uncomfortable truths about themselves and the world show significantly higher levels of psychological resilience and life satisfaction over time.

The researchers dubbed this the “reality acceptance effect.” Participants who engaged in regular reality-checking exercises reported lower levels of anxiety and depression, and higher levels of goal achievement compared to those who tended to avoid uncomfortable truths.

This research underscores the importance of facing life’s harsh realities head-on. It’s not about being pessimistic, but about building a resilient mindset that can weather life’s inevitable storms.

In this eye-opening episode, we sit down with Dom Smales, founder of Gleam Futures, to discuss why the creator economy is on the verge of collapse and what influencers can do to WIN in 2025.

With a wealth of experience managing some of the biggest names in the industry, including Zoella, Dom shares his insights on the shifting dynamics of the creator landscape.

We explore why creators are at risk of losing their influence if they don’t adapt, and how they can successfully transition from influencers to entrepreneurs. Dom also reveals the key traits and strategies that helped his most successful talents, like Zoella, rise to the top and sustain their success over time.

Whether you’re a creator or entrepreneur, this episode is packed with actionable advice on how to navigate the challenges of the evolving creator economy and secure long-term success.
​Listen in to learn and develop your thiking...​

Until next week - smash your success,

Dan

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1-1 Coaching with Dan

In my goal to help more entrepreneurs/people who are looking to level up their careers, I've just started taking 1-1 consulting calls (only 1 a week)

Why book a call? Some of my expertise/success:

I've built 5 startups. 1 win, 1 fail, and 3 still going.

E-Commerce: Heights — with revenue over $15M a year.

Community: Foundrs, one of the UK's top founder communities

Podcasting: Leaders Media - bootstrapped media company that makes the UK's 2nd business podcast Secret Leaders, with over 50M downloads.

Health/Mental Health: Managed to overcome burnout, insomnia, depression & anxiety in pursuit of success as I talk about in my interview with Steven Bartlett on Diary of a CEO​

Angel Investing: I've invested in over 86 startups

Coached & Mentored: Certified coach & done lots of mentoring

Personal Brand: Have grown to 160k on LinkedIn and X (Twitter) in the past 12 months

So if you're interested in booking a session with me to talk all things business or building a personal brand, book for 30-minutes or 45-minutes. (limited spots).

Science of Success Vault

I'm building a vault of valuable tools, resources, and one sheets that I hope help you succeed.

These will be stored in the ever-growing 'Science of Success' vault — you can always access that here

Want to take your success (even more) seriously? 👇​
🧠 Fuel your brain and feed your gut, try Heights here (use code 'SOSDMS' for 15% off your first month of any subscription

🎧 Check out my podcast Secret Leaders here​

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